Tired, drained, enthusiastic, excited
It's amazing how we can feel tired and drained, yet enthusiastic and excited about doing God's work all at the same time. It has been physically draining these past few weeks. Running around preparing for the mission trip and camps, getting down with fever and stomach upset... wondering if I've been trying too hard to be a hero by saying "yes" to whatever Father Brian asks of me... wondering if i should have heeded Dan's (and indirectly Hsien-Li's) advice to discern properly if God is leading me to say "yes" to all these works of His...
Yes, it's been tiring. It has even been frustrating and irritating at times. Yet, upon further reflection, i've realised that even if i didn't discern carefully (ALTHOUGH I SHOULD HAVE - LESSON LEARNT) God made all things go well. As seen in Wilfred's entry, Balai was beautiful. Although i've been there 2 years ago, this was a totally new experience. Getting to mingle with the students at Santa Yosep, teaching them and playing with them for one morning, is an experience that i'll never forget.
I think the most important thing when doing the will of God is one's disposition... are we trying to or even willing to listen to what He wants of us? Or are we too pre-occupied with our personal growth that we fail to jump into the deep and make that leap of faith when He calls us to? Are we overly concerned with our well-being - spiritual, emotional and physical - that we fail to see the needs of others and go out of our way to be of service to them? On the other hand, are we over-zealous in doing God's work that we forget God Himself and what He calls us to do?
Yet, these answers are not easy to find. I haven't found them yet. Nonetheless, i know that as long as we stick close to Him, we won't go far wrong. As Uncle Gerard always says, God doesn't contradict Himself.
Yes, it's been tiring. It has even been frustrating and irritating at times. Yet, upon further reflection, i've realised that even if i didn't discern carefully (ALTHOUGH I SHOULD HAVE - LESSON LEARNT) God made all things go well. As seen in Wilfred's entry, Balai was beautiful. Although i've been there 2 years ago, this was a totally new experience. Getting to mingle with the students at Santa Yosep, teaching them and playing with them for one morning, is an experience that i'll never forget.
I think the most important thing when doing the will of God is one's disposition... are we trying to or even willing to listen to what He wants of us? Or are we too pre-occupied with our personal growth that we fail to jump into the deep and make that leap of faith when He calls us to? Are we overly concerned with our well-being - spiritual, emotional and physical - that we fail to see the needs of others and go out of our way to be of service to them? On the other hand, are we over-zealous in doing God's work that we forget God Himself and what He calls us to do?
Yet, these answers are not easy to find. I haven't found them yet. Nonetheless, i know that as long as we stick close to Him, we won't go far wrong. As Uncle Gerard always says, God doesn't contradict Himself.
In quietness and trust, Lord,
I submit my life into Your hands.
Lord, that You increase,
And I recede.
Rhino 5
posted by Rhino for God! at 12:44 PM
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