Spiritual Trust Fall
One of my reflections of late has revealed more about myself, and inevitably in that process more about God.
Fr Henri Nouwen in his book "The only necessary thing, living a prayerful life" mentions, "in times of spiritual dryness, it is precisely in these times that God is close, and calling you to a greater faithfulness."
I guess in the spiritual walk of discipleship, when it remains on the level of the intellect, it may sound like an achievement if one is "maturing in the faith" or if one is "put through a test", or encounters spiritual dryness. Perhaps even a tinge of pride may exist, as it were in my case, knowing with both my heart and mind, that after the experience in Rome, it would be a time of testing, coming down from the mountain, from a "Transfiguration" experience, into the deserts, as Jesus was taken to the deserts to be tempted after his baptism in the Jordan.
More trust, more faithfulness? What if i don't 'feel' like it? I don't really feel like being more faithful Lord? But then again, isn't that the essence of trust, of faith? Fr Antonio shared at his homily on Hebrews 11 that "Seeing is Believing is poor theology", - Faith is precisely believing without seeing.
"Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see." - Heb 11
More and more, i realise that faith is not simply believing. It's not a matter of "Aiyah, you believe then believe, don't believe, nothing i say can make you believe. It's a faith mar" - sounds familiar?
I realise, faith is a gift.
Faith entails taking a step forward into the darkness, not knowing where that next step may lead you, even if it entails stepping into a drain. Those of you who have played TRUST FALL at orientation games know how hard it is for a first timer to take that leap of faith and fall into the arms of their friends. Yet, those who have analysed the game would agree that it builds confidence, trust, and builds the person's character and development. Similarly, the seniors, esp game masters have no qualms about doing trust fall again and again, with little and almost no fear, for through experience, they know that they would be caught by the arms of their friends.
In this same way, we need to learn spiritual trust fall.
Only by letting go of ourselves, our inhibitions, our fears, can we fall into the strong arms of our Maker.
"Surely the arm of the LORD is not too short to save, nor his ear too dull to hear." - Isa 59:1
(Typing this verse brought a little smile to my face. How lovely written this is, by the prophet Isaiah. It's almost silly to have this line in scripture isn't it? Like, how could anyone think the arm of the Lord is too short? Yet, the source of many of our fears lie in this exact sentiment.
What if i never meet the person of my dreams? What if i let go of what i have now and it never comes back? (Riches, our jobs, our dreams, our school grades, someone we're dating, perhaps even our comfort zones of where we are in the Lord)
Only in faith, when we believe without seeing, being certain of what we do not see, knowing who's arms we fall into, can we discover the spiritual development of trust in the Lord. Only through and in this trust can we discover the faithfulness of the Lord.
"Lord, you ask us to lose ourselves in You and we will find ourselves. It's inevitable that we may feel 'lost' in the process. Give us the grace to fall into Your arms, your dreams, your desires, your plans for our lives. That we may fight the good fight of faith. Lord, i believe. Help thou my unbelief."
Rhino No. 7
Fr Henri Nouwen in his book "The only necessary thing, living a prayerful life" mentions, "in times of spiritual dryness, it is precisely in these times that God is close, and calling you to a greater faithfulness."
I guess in the spiritual walk of discipleship, when it remains on the level of the intellect, it may sound like an achievement if one is "maturing in the faith" or if one is "put through a test", or encounters spiritual dryness. Perhaps even a tinge of pride may exist, as it were in my case, knowing with both my heart and mind, that after the experience in Rome, it would be a time of testing, coming down from the mountain, from a "Transfiguration" experience, into the deserts, as Jesus was taken to the deserts to be tempted after his baptism in the Jordan.
More trust, more faithfulness? What if i don't 'feel' like it? I don't really feel like being more faithful Lord? But then again, isn't that the essence of trust, of faith? Fr Antonio shared at his homily on Hebrews 11 that "Seeing is Believing is poor theology", - Faith is precisely believing without seeing.
"Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see." - Heb 11
More and more, i realise that faith is not simply believing. It's not a matter of "Aiyah, you believe then believe, don't believe, nothing i say can make you believe. It's a faith mar" - sounds familiar?
I realise, faith is a gift.
Faith entails taking a step forward into the darkness, not knowing where that next step may lead you, even if it entails stepping into a drain. Those of you who have played TRUST FALL at orientation games know how hard it is for a first timer to take that leap of faith and fall into the arms of their friends. Yet, those who have analysed the game would agree that it builds confidence, trust, and builds the person's character and development. Similarly, the seniors, esp game masters have no qualms about doing trust fall again and again, with little and almost no fear, for through experience, they know that they would be caught by the arms of their friends.
In this same way, we need to learn spiritual trust fall.Only by letting go of ourselves, our inhibitions, our fears, can we fall into the strong arms of our Maker.
"Surely the arm of the LORD is not too short to save, nor his ear too dull to hear." - Isa 59:1
(Typing this verse brought a little smile to my face. How lovely written this is, by the prophet Isaiah. It's almost silly to have this line in scripture isn't it? Like, how could anyone think the arm of the Lord is too short? Yet, the source of many of our fears lie in this exact sentiment.
What if i never meet the person of my dreams? What if i let go of what i have now and it never comes back? (Riches, our jobs, our dreams, our school grades, someone we're dating, perhaps even our comfort zones of where we are in the Lord)
Only in faith, when we believe without seeing, being certain of what we do not see, knowing who's arms we fall into, can we discover the spiritual development of trust in the Lord. Only through and in this trust can we discover the faithfulness of the Lord.
"Lord, you ask us to lose ourselves in You and we will find ourselves. It's inevitable that we may feel 'lost' in the process. Give us the grace to fall into Your arms, your dreams, your desires, your plans for our lives. That we may fight the good fight of faith. Lord, i believe. Help thou my unbelief."
Rhino No. 7
posted by Rhino for God! at 10:27 AM
1 Comments:
Hi Daniel,
I'm much blessed and encouraged by yr post. Yes indeed faith is a gift and testing of faith will develop perseverance in us to continue pursuing God. May the Lord renew your heart to trust Him.
Eric
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